(@Benglorious) Brett is in Poland so we have no natural leader or a jokes. Prediction: 0-0 United. m (@tom_mcghee) As above. That aside, pretty good. Prediction: 0-0 United. m (@bifurcated_utd) I’m in Poland. In minus 26 temperatures. Survival is my priority. Prediction: Death. 0-0 United.
Mourinho and the United Red Boys of Old Dreams Trafford turned the clock back to the good old days. Of this season. Shit for most of the game. Not shit when we do something not shit. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. I actually got a tiny bit excited about a game for the first […]
(@Benglorious) Prediction: Below is an idiot. They know what he looks like. 0-0 United. m (@tom_mcghee) No words today due to the Academy’s shameful lack of recognition for Thor. For shame. Prediction: Repost to above: He’s had a haircut. 0-0 United. m (@bifurcated_utd) I’m not doing words cos it’s us playing against a team even worse […]
I don’t need to write anything about the game here, as the 5 things we learned bit below more than makes up the word count. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. The best bit was tasting Graeme’s salty tears. 2. Other good bits were Lukaku and Pogba and Matic. 3. Sanchez was not a good […]
(@Benglorious) Remember that time we beat Chelsea because Herrera stood on top of their best player for the whole match like a tiny Spanish hat? Well, today we’re fucked because Ander’s only gone and got himself a terminal injury as per BT Sport’s insightful commentary team. Maybe we could just try and beat them […]
We had to endure a WhatsApp group chat with real talk from McGhee. This game was bad. Or at least some aspect of it was. Whatever McGhee was talking about. Dunno. Didn’t read it. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. So confused. Before the game everyone was mad about Pogba not playing in […]
(@Benglorious) No idea how Sevilla got to play in the Champions League after being relegated last season, but that Agbonlahor is a hell of a player. Prediction: Hawkeye to actually draw a straight line. Black Widow to confiscate his crayons. 0-0 United. m (@tom_mcghee) I cannot do words as I am too busy watching the […]
As the mighty Red Army from Manchester goes marching on to Wemberleeeeee gloreeeeee in spite of VAR and its fascist regime of hate and bigotry. I forgot my point. <—–That picture actually matches the narrative. Who’d have thought. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Lukaku is the greatest striker in the history of the […]
(@Benglorious) Instead of starring in film trailers or pimping out tractors, I wish our players would sometimes let loose and steal a taxi or dress as a suicide bomber or add their brand to a Flowers of Manchester memorial or even just do a silly dance on Instagram. Football is too money-oriented these […]
Phil Jones and Chris Smalling are the best. BEST. ABSO BEST. In a parallel Universe Jose got his wish and the game is still being played. It’s currently 9087 – 0. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. I didn’t watch the game because I wasn’t watching it. 2. My new jam is Taken The Series. […]
(@Benglorious) Prediction: m (@tom_mcghee) Prediction: m (@bifurcated_utd) I can’t do words this week, so glad you guys have got my back. Prediction: 0-0 United.
With Huddersfield distracted by trying to figure out whether they were a Field or a Town, United notched up two goals in spite of their best attempts to miss them both like the heroes we deserve. Lols @ Sanchez Rooneying his penalty like a true Red Leg. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. The Last […]