Leicester vs United

Benno (@Benglorious):

“Lololololo Radamel Falcao!”

Call me old-fashioned, but I believe that tens of thousands of people laughing at their club’s latest signing can’t be good for the player in question’s confidence.  This showed last Sunday as the poor bloke started his United career with zero goals.  Seeing as this is what he was hired for, his new employers can’t have been that impressed.  Imagine a milkman on his first ever round failing to deliver any milk and you can maybe understand the gravity of the situation.  As supporters of the club, we should be getting behind our players and singing them songs of encouragement to help them perform better and to let them know that they have our loyalty and respect.  I know for a fact that Dave the milkman appreciated my efforts every morning right up until the court case.

That’s enough preaching for now as I’m only paid to write about the kicking and running part of the sport.  Lester is our opponent this weekend.  I’m assuming he’s got a big garden and at least ten mates or it’s going to be a bit of a wasted journey.  All I know about this Lester chap is that he likes foxes, crisps and Gary Lineker so he must be a sound bloke.

Prediction:  With a squad that includes Emile Heskey, Muzzy Izzet and Willy Thorne, Leicester will be no pushovers.  That being said, Di María will continue his already dazzling start in a United shirt by delivering two erection-inducing assists for Falcao to slot home just before half-time.  After the break, Mata will banana a free-kick of such perfection into the top corner that the referee will have no choice but to award two goals.  Leicester will become dispirited at this blatant disregard for the laws of the beautiful game, and this will leave them wide open for Herrera and Rooney to bag a cheeky goal each and finish the game off nicely.  1-0 Leicester.

.

Brett:

Your going two half too bear width me, has Aimar lidl bit Russ tea, have in knot dunne this four sew long…

While hive bean a whey, hive bean biz he perfecting a real Lee a maze sink sand wedge analogy, in clue ding  sand wedge real hated fillings, bread, hand sew on hahn sew fourth – hit’s real he fun knee, heaven if eye do say sew mice elf, Butt Best key pit two mice elf has ewe well hone Lee one two steel hit hand go hair hound saying “hay list hen two this sand wedge analogy eye may dap. Doh nut list hen two Brett he dead knot may kit hoop, eye did” hand the hat sore tough thing. Hand hit goose width owts hay ink, hob via sleigh, eye have bean key ping hoop two date width hall the eggs siting trans fur hack tea VT.

Their the hat wasn’t sew bad. I donught no watt I was war read a bout. Stihl god it.

Prediction: Danny with is custom marry to. Pat Rice Evra two do watt head us best. RE O hand Vid Ditch two Ruel the deafens. Shin Gee Kag Aware two prove hide haul the ham you niche hen. Hand Cheek car heet hoe toes core juan fran the sub stitch chute bench. 1-0 Linekster. Like Bob’s use you all joke butt mush bet tuh!

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