Prediction: Brett to be so wrong he’s convicted of high treason, which, luckily, is still punishable by death. Welbeck with his customary two, Rojo penalised, no sign of Falcao. 0-0 United.
Let me say something that might shock you: I ruddy love Hull. Amidst a field of giants – Rod, Ship’s, by very loose association the savoury hoop – the City of Hull* really stands out. Its postcode is HU and its time zone is Greenwich Mean Time. Other valuable websites are www.hullcc.gov.uk and it is the UK’s 2017 City of Culture. Assuming the last one is for the purposes of a joke we don’t get.
The film review feature is again sadly absent because I’ve been too ruddy worried to watch films. God Bless.
Prediction: Brett to be bang wrong. 3-0 United. The scorers? You decide! For Ibra, turn to page 23, for Mkhitaryan, turn to page 48. For Wayne Rooney, colour in the circle on page 2. Try and stay in the lines.
What can we say about Hull that hasn’t already been said. I’ll tell you what we can say about Hull that hasn’t already been said, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! BECAUSE WE PLAY THEM EVERY SODDING DAY OF THE RUDDY YEAR FFS.
Prediction: Tom and Benno to say something we’ve said before because of the thing I said about there being absolutely nothing to say about them that hasn’t been said before, on account of us playing them every sodding day of the ruddy etc 0-0 United.