Lashitinfromayradfromgoallikehthehammerlegendyourareford more like.
In other news: Skipper Roo finally silenced his critics with a display of such wanting-to-chainsaw-your-eyes-out-with-a-chainsaw-made-from-barbed-wire-so-you-can-never-suffer-watching-him-play-football-again depths. We all killed ourselves irl and that’s why we are silent, is the a joke. I’m writing this from beyond the grave. Tell my mum to feed the cat. And not the oily tuna. It plays havoc with her thyroid. Is another joke. I don’t even have a cat. Just riffing on the a joke super highway in the sky with diamonds.
Here’s five things we learned from sixfields … SICKfields, when Rashford is playing. AMIRITE?!:
1. We can easily win every game if we get to shoot at an open goal from a yard out all the time.
2) Rooney. Get rid.
3. Thought Wayne looked like his old self. By which I mean him at 70.
4. Rashford is the lifeblood of Manchester United’s blood.
5. Herrera Rocher is really spoiling us.
6. Lol @ 5.
7. ffs I meant 3. 5 is bad.
8. Yeah. Thought I’d save it for a tweet but fuck it I’m a maverick.