United 3 – 1 Sunderland

As predicted, if Benno used Brett’s lyrics then world famousness would come a-knocking … and now Benno is the world famousest for being a ‘Tollesbury Gamer’ who played a computer games a month ago or something. Idgi.

 

Here’s 5 things we learned between the mountains of blow and fountains of boobies:

 

1. Winning is good.

2. Losing is bad.

3. Moyes is bad.

4. Ergo, Moyes is a loser.

5. PROFIT!!!!

6. Did you see the Mkhitaryan goal tho?? He was like ‘uh oh ball’s behind me yo’ but then he was all like ‘don’t even matter dogg’ and it was all like a scorpion if his legs were a stinger.

7. Innit tho. Scorpions cannot kick like that due to the way their leg joints are hinged.

8. Makes zero sense. People are idiots.

9. Not us.

10. Brett is not us.

11. Brett is all of us.

12. Gross.

 

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