Champions League

CL: United 2 - 0 Benfica

CL: United 2 – 0 Benfica

Daley Blind > Anthony Martial > Romelu Lukaku > Jose Mourinho > Daley Blind. Here’s 5 things we learned about football: 1. Equality is good, but kids shouldn’t be professional goalkeepers. 2. Unless they play for anyone else. 3.The hidden blade is back, baby, and it’s fucking siiiiiiiiick. 4. deli alley’s goals were good.

CL: Benfica 0 - 1 United

CL: Benfica 0 – 1 United

What a game. Here’s 5 things we learned that we have never learned previously, but don’t check any of the previous reviews as that might compromise our special relationship: 1. Rashford is the only acceptable proof of God’s existence. 2. That keeper is the only person in the world who is worse at his job […]

CL: Benfica vs. United

CL: Benfica vs. United

 @Benglorious) After the weekend’s disappointing game against Liverpool in the mediocrity of a competition that is the Premier League, tonight is a welcome return to the unrivalled magnificence of the UEFA Champions League European Cup Sponsored By Gazprom. Mourinho rested a good number of his squad ahead of this match, with many of them seen […]

CL: CSKA Moscow 1 - 4 (FOUR) United

CL: CSKA Moscow 1 – 4 (FOUR) United

5 things innit: 1. Had a look and nobody had done owt so i didn’t either. Cool story bro. 2. Same. 3. Oh.

CL: CSKA Moscow vs. United

CL: CSKA Moscow vs. United

 @Benglorious) Oh.  (@tom_mcghee) Had a look and nobody had done owt so I didn’t either. Cool story bro.   (@bifurcated_utd) Same.

CL: United 3 (NOT FOUR) - 0 FC Basel

CL: United 3 (NOT FOUR) – 0 FC Basel

5 things we learned: 1. We’re lazy cunts.  

CL: United vs. FC Basel

CL: United vs. FC Basel

Palace 1 - 2 United

Palace 1 – 2 United

United reaffirmed their not drawing all the games ever credentials with a not a draw that takes them within a very tall giant’s breath of Chelsea at the top of the table, and a very, very, very tall man who failed to get his giant’s licence on a technicality’s breath of the Champions League places. […]

Wolfsburg 3 – 2 United

BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHA (1/-1)   Here’s five things we learned from Europa League qualification: Swan) We couldn’t keep the wolf from the door, so to speak. Twit twoo) Louis van Gaal is a fraud. When I mispronounce stuff I just get laughed at but he seems to have made it into a whole career. Tree-creeper) The whole […]

United 0 – 0 PSV

No goals all means we’re one step closer to the promised land. Can’t wait to get there. Don’t get us wrong, we’re really enjoying the journey and all. Lots. Really. Really, really enjoying it. To the max. And back. Lots. Yep. Here’s 5 things we’ve learned this week: 1ne) Learning is as learning does. 2wo) Life […]

United vs PSV

United vs PSV

 Benno (@Benglorious) Refusing to do a preview after Tom smashed it last game. Let’s see him do it again. m Opposition summary: PSV do football. Prediction:  I don’t have a point to forget. 0-0 United.    Tom (@tom_mcghee) Chapter 2 McGhee opened his eyes cautiously; despite being the sole passenger on Air Force One, a lifetime at […]

CL: United 1 - 0 CSKA Moscow

CL: United 1 – 0 CSKA Moscow

Yadda blah etc…   Here’s 5 things we learned: d) Even if you hate something with an unbridled passion, it will sometimes score an unmarked header from 5 yards out.  

Bi-Mark: Footballiversity

Bi-Benno: Where Are They Right Now..?

Bi-Konny: Michael Owen Reads Mean Tweets...

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