Jesse

Tis oft said (BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA like olden days language innit. Like Quaff, or Peacock Feathers) that the FA Cup is a magical competition, where miracles abound etc etc … Alexis Sanchez. Here’s another 5 things we learned: 1. Jesse moonwalking all over the pitch is the greatest celebration of all time and anyone who disagrees is […]

Mourinho avoided handing Arsenal the Premier League Title at Old Trafford and didn’t kick a boot into David Beckham’s face after the match, so, should be seen as a vast improvement on the Fergie Era imho.   Here is another 5 things we learned, taking our total tally of learns over the last 4 years […]

AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US!!!! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US!!!!! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSS … !!!! Wait. What were we saying?! andnowyou’regonnabelieveus, andnowyou’regonnabelieveus, andnowyou’regonnabelieveus no, it’s gone.   Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. After a couple of minor upgrades Atreus becomes a decent ally to Kratos. 2. Herrera is the […]

We learned nothing. That doesn’t count.

As Jesse Lingered continues to single-handedly win us every trophy we have won in the past 30 years, Jose Mourinho continues to burn them. Here’s 5 things we learned innit: 1. Letting Steven drive is a mistake. 2. Lingard’s goal was good … but his dancing drives me mad !! 3. What game was it?

Rooney sure showed us. BahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahBAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH etc. Here’s 5 things we learnt: 1. Even without some of our first choice players I find it very difficult to believe that United can catch us now. 2. But you’rOh!! It’s a joke! 3. If you have dinner and miss the game the result seems better because you didn’t […]

Messi Lingard saves the day once again. Though actually playing football quite well for 90 minutes might also be worth a try. Here’s another 5 things we learned: 1. hashtagmourihnoout 2. hashtagdychein 3. I wish your dog was dead too tbf. 4. That is too far Brett. Too far by far. 5. It was funny […]

And the Reds go marchin’ on on on. Off. Here’s another 5 things we learned: 1. Have already forgotten entire game. 2. I think Tony V got injured. 3. Was that the game where Hammy Gammon Gary Barry scored?

I’m in a queue for tickets for next round. Bite me. Here’s 5 things what we learned: 1. GTA survivals have gotten a lot harder. 1. 40yr-old consumer units do not meet current safety regulations. 2. That was meant to be 2. 3. That one wasn’t. 4. 2 that is, not one.

United’s tactics have come under intense scrutiny after their second half display saw them revert to a flat back eleven. For those of you who are new to Association Football, a flat back eleven is kind of like a flat back twelve but without the extra character bought in on the heist and without the […]