Southampton vs. United

Southampton vs. United

(@Benglorious) Howdy, pardner. It’s time to dust off yer six-shooter and mount up. Tonight, we ride. By tonight I mean late afternoon, and by ride I mean scrape another goalless draw. The Pools panel (ask yer da) must hate us. Prediction: All posses joined immediately and all missions completed with no software crashes. Lol more […]

United 0 - 0 Southampton

United 0 – 0 Southampton

As we consolidated our position at the top of the any normal English Premier League season table, with another outstanding top of the any normal English Premier League season table performance, we learned 5 things… 1. Explosive diarrhoea is preferable to what we just watched. 2. As is vomiting at the same time. 3. I […]

United vs. Southampton

United vs. Southampton

  (@Benglorious) My Christmas was great right up until the time I got a Christmas virus and I made my toilet look like a cheap coffee maker. The agony and frailty I’m experiencing as I type this still makes me feel better than watching the highlights of our last two games. Prediction: May try solid […]

Southampton 0 - 1 (NOT FOUR) United

Southampton 0 – 1 (NOT FOUR) United

Poland is a regional power as well as a possible emerging world power. It has the eighth largest and one of the most dynamic economies in the European Union, simultaneously achieving a very high rank on the Human Development Index. Additionally, the Polish Stock Exchange in Warsaw is the largest and most important in Central and Eastern Europe. Poland is a developed and democratic country, which maintains a high-income economy along with very […]

Southampton vs. United

Southampton vs. United

 @Benglorious) Remember when we got beat by Southampton because we wore a grey kit? Days so dark all we could taste were the bitter ashes of yet another measly premiership title. Our fourth one, for Christ’s sake. It still sickens me to my very core to think of this, even though twenty years have passed. […]

Southampton 0 - 0 United

Southampton 0 – 0 United

We asked Jose Mourinho to comment on the last 6 years of Bifurcated, and he had this to say: The intensity is there. Which is just what I ask for. I could not ask for more.  Here’s 5 things we learned when the football interrupted our 90 minutes of doing other things to ease the […]

Southampton vs United

Southampton vs United

(@Benglorious) Southampton are yet another of those teams that played Sunderland one day and stole their kits. Seriously:  why do so many teams have the same kits? I may be colour-blind, but even I know there’s enough colours in a set of Crayolas for every team to have a different colour shirt. Southampton could easily […]

EFL Cup Final: United 3 - 2 Southampton

EFL Cup Final: United 3 – 2 Southampton

AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US! WE’RE GONNA WIN THE LEAGUE cup! Here’s 5 things we learned after our momentous day out at Wemberley: 1. Winning is good when you’re hungover. 2. It’s also good at other times. 3. Can’t decide if Lingard […]

English Champions League World Cup Final

English Champions League World Cup Final

(@Benglorious) If I get time, I’ll do the best Southampton joke there’s ever been. If I don’t get time, I’ll just mention Craig David. Prediction: I may miss the start of the match so someone will have to fill me in. This is our most important match of the last seven days. Pogba was born […]

Watford 3 - 1 United

Watford 3 – 1 United

In a classic case of life imitating art – THAT’S RIGHT!!! WE ARE ART FUCKOS!! – Exactly what us said was gonna happen, actually went and happened, apart from the bit that happened at the end, that we didn’t say would happen exactly. After wrapping up the EPL against Southampton, we have now had our […]

United 2 - 0 Southampton

United 2 – 0 Southampton

“Remember when we won the league after two games. That was today.” Says it all. ‘Says it all’, although integral to the point, and acting somewhat as a qualifier/modifier (delete whichever is somewhere near closest to the appropriate rhetorical device) to the point being made, doesn’t count as an extra sentence, the top sentence stands […]

United vs. Southampton

United vs. Southampton

“Johnny Three-Names pulls aside the beaded curtain of uncertainty”    Benno (@Benglorious) Sticking to our weird, recent theme of not doing our previews half an hour before kick off means that I actually have time to do some research for tonight’s (actually tomorrow’s (no, I’m not a time-traveller (or was I?).) game) – It’s Friday. Jesus died […]

Bi-Mark: Footballiversity

Bi-Benno: Where Are They Right Now..?

Bi-Konny: Michael Owen Reads Mean Tweets...