(@Benglorious)

I must say I did enjoy the footage of our brave boys playing ping pong with a football in the sun. Really going to help them claw their way back into the champions league spots.

Prediction: Martial with a brace using the penhold grip and a ton of topspin. 0-0 United

M

 (@tom_mcghee)

During my hours of background research for this feature I learnt that Chelsea was first a place name of Old English origin and the most common theory of its meaning is Chalk Wharf. Frank means to be honest or sincere, synonyms of which are ‘blunt’, ‘curt’ or ‘forthright’ – Curt is the only one that works as a name so if he was American he’d be Kurt Lampard, FBI. Probably. The mind plays tricks. Nobody knows what the fuck Lampard means and I don’t think anybody really cares. In conclusion, yes.

Picard (2019)

He’s no James Tiberius Kirk – that guy’s voice volume control was the best in the business bar none Maybe Adam West.

Prediction: Genuinely sad day with Harry Gregg passing away so our GBOL should really win it for him imho. 2-0, Rooney brace.

 M

(@bifurcated_utd)

“Here, have 10 days off spent at a training camp away from your family and friends with your work colleagues” Worst. Holiday. Ever.

But, now that we know that Fred can score a free kick, and Tony M can score worldies during a kick about in Spain, I’m feeling much more enthusiastic about the whole season tbh

Prediction: Still don’t care.