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United 1 - 0 Watford

United 1 – 0 Watford

Goodbye Michael Carrick, you were a wonderful … I’m gonna say … midfielder man?!   WOOOOHHHHOOOOOOOO!! NO MORE RUDDY GAMwhat? FA Cup what? FFS.   Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Didn’t watch it on a stream or even the highlights that’s how little I care now. 2. Agents of SHIELD was lovely, Fitz & […]

West Ham 0 - 0 United

West Ham 0 – 0 United

JFC, STILL ONE MORE GAME TO GO! KILL ME! NOW! PLEASE! Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Football is a great game. I love it so much. 2. It is the greatest game and I love it. 3. More like Mark IG-Noble !! 4. More like IDGI-Noble !! 5. I love football more than all […]

Brighton 1 - 0 United

Brighton 1 – 0 United

A If we can beat all the top teams, and yet get beaten by all the worst teams, and yet can win, lose, or draw against all the mid-table teams, and still finish se, no I’ve forgotten my etc.     Here’s another 5 things we learned, even if we haven’t learned what the league […]

United 2 - 1 Arsenal

United 2 – 1 Arsenal

a He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink. He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink. He sings the songs that remind him of the good times. He sings the songs that remind him of the best times… Who ‘He’ is … I guess we’ll never know.     Here’s 5 things we […]

FAC SF United 2 - 1 Tottenham Spurs

FAC SF United 2 – 1 Tottenham Spurs

AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US!!!! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US!!!!! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSS … !!!! Wait. What were we saying?! andnowyou’regonnabelieveus, andnowyou’regonnabelieveus, andnowyou’regonnabelieveus no, it’s gone.   Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. After a couple of minor upgrades Atreus becomes a decent ally to Kratos. 2. Herrera is the […]

Bournemouth 0 - 2 United

Bournemouth 0 – 2 United

We learned nothing. That doesn’t count.

United 0 - 1 West Brom

United 0 – 1 West Brom

whnwkmkcsmklsnncjknsjdkcnjsnjkdnfjnsdcjnbkbkbkbfokbofbkofbkfbmkfmbmmfgdsajkhhwuoahvuinsadivninavnianvniavna xjkcsdcsdnsajvnsjvnsjdv;sdnvsdn;anvsdnavlsdlka;vnsalnvlsdnvlsd etc Here’s 5 things we sjdhfkjsdahvcjksdjkbvjkdsbauibfewbacinjknlakwecnwamc: 1. Well done, City. We’ll try harder next season maybe. 2. Fuck City suck it you blue fucks. 3. We are terrible at football.

City 2 - 3 United

City 2 – 3 United

When it was 2-0 we were all like oh no this is so sad I want to legit kill myself and die and then when we won 2-3 we were all like omg. Here’s 5 things we learned from the derby that defined a generation:   1. Bahahahahahaha City you abso shower of cunts. 2. […]

United 2 - 0 Swansea

United 2 – 0 Swansea

Brett is in Poland so he can’t make us learn nothing.

FAC: United 2 - 0 Brighton

FAC: United 2 – 0 Brighton

Brett is in Poland so he can’t make us learn nothing.

CL: United (1) 1 - 2 (2) Sevilla

CL: United (1) 1 – 2 (2) Sevilla

Brett is in Poland so he can’t make us learn nothing.

United 2 - 1 Liverpool

United 2 – 1 Liverpool

Bahahahahahahahahahaha Graeme Souness. Face. 5 things learned: 1. Beating Liverpool is legit the best. 2. Second is Souness’ salty salty tears. Man forgot how to form sentences hahahahahaha 3. Rashford is better than the thing you like. 4. Poor old Jamie Carragher. Sad indictment of our nation when a grown man can no longer spit […]

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