1. Explosive diarrhoea is preferable to what we just watched.

2. As is vomiting at the same time.

3. I liked your coffee maker reference in the preview.

4. As a fellow sufferer of said virus, I must say mine is more akin to a regurgitated 3-week aged banana through a kaleidoscope. But still preferable.

5. There are now no jokes that make this funny, we are bad.