Fergie apparently started out one point better than this. Moyes started out a bit better than that. Van Gaal started out a bit better still. Makes you think. About punching a hole in the Universe with a shark made from Duncan Castles’ face. That aside, pretty good.

Here’s 5 things we learned from, the first leg, of the final of who’s the best United out of the two remaining Uniteds in the English Premier League:

1. I am bored of every Manchester United that isn’t the old one when we were good.

1) Golden Moles are pretty sweet little killers.

2. You can’t have two 1s, it makes a mockery of this whole system.

2) Yet we can have two 9s who cancel each other out. Makes you think.