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	<title>Bifurcated Manchester United &#187; graphs</title>
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	<description>Quasi-Futuristic Allegorical Football Meta-Narrative</description>
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		<title>United 2 &#8211; 0 Crystal Palace</title>
		<link>https://bifurcated.co.uk/manchester-united-chitty-chatty/reaction/united-2-0-crystal-palace-2</link>
		<comments>https://bifurcated.co.uk/manchester-united-chitty-chatty/reaction/united-2-0-crystal-palace-2#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Apr 2016 15:34:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Us]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Postgame]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Reaction]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Alan Pardew]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Benno]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Crystal Palace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Damian]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[graphs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Joy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[O.G]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rejoice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Roondog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Streams]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Top Four Finish]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://bifurcated.co.uk/?p=14319</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Roondog is well and truly back. Run tell your Mamma. Scream it from the rooftops. Throw a party for some friends you haven&#8217;t seen since like forever. Live today like it&#8217;s your last. Tell that man or woman in the office that you flirt with occasionally, that you would leave your husband or wife and [&#8230;]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-13579" src="http://bifurcated.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/Matteo-253x300.jpg" alt="" width="253" height="300" /></p>
<p>Roondog is well and truly back. Run tell your Mamma. Scream it from the rooftops. Throw a party for some friends you haven&#8217;t seen since like forever. Live today like it&#8217;s your last. Tell that man or woman in the office that you flirt with occasionally, that you would leave your husband or wife and children for a sniff of his or her gusset. Sing. Dance. Rejoice. Overdose on this unparalleled joy.</p>
<p>Lol @ The Premier League if this shower of towels finish in the top four.</p>
<p>I blame Benno.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>Here&#8217;s 5 things we learned about the matchings:</p>
<p>*graph with upward projection emoji*) I like how when we win now it means nothing because you know the next game could be the exact opposite.</p>
<p>*graph with downward projection emoji*) I really fucking hate Wayne. Irrationally tbf but even still, can we release him into some woods.</p>
<p>5) Victoria?</p>
<p>6) Too soon.</p>
<p>2) Streams is not gud.</p>
<p>3) United r gudder than streams.</p>
<p>4) Just barely.</p>
<p>1) Or sometimes fully-clothedly.</p>
<p>2 revisited) Streams muted with other radio commentary is also not gud, cos radio waves travel faster than stream waves, and so you hear the thing that&#8217;s about to actually happen approximately 37 seconds before you see it actually happen.</p>
<p>2 rerevisited) If only there was a legal way to watch a match live, in actual time, with everything actually happening as it&#8217;s actually happening. I&#8217;d pay handsomely for that.</p>
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