Bifurcated Manchester United » Hugh Grant https://bifurcated.co.uk Quasi-Futuristic Allegorical Football Meta-Narrative Sun, 24 Apr 2022 09:33:40 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.1.41 Manchester United Vs The Chelseas https://bifurcated.co.uk/manchester-united-chitty-chatty/pregame/manchester-united-vs-the-chelseas https://bifurcated.co.uk/manchester-united-chitty-chatty/pregame/manchester-united-vs-the-chelseas#comments Sun, 16 Apr 2017 10:41:06 +0000 http://bifurcated.co.uk/?p=15541 Juanzone
(@Benglorious)
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Is Eddie Redmayne the new Hugh Grant or does he just need to speak up a bit? This reporter says ‘yes’. Luckily, the memory of every word he said too quietly in that film last night will soon be erased by the complete demolition of United by this season’s champions-elect, Chelsea. Was that a run-on sentence? Possibly. Is this a run-on sentence? No. Is this 150 words yet? Almost.
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Prediction: Chelsea to demoralise Jommo so much with their victory that he ends up and that’s 150. 4-0 Chelsea.

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2017-02-10 23.14.32 (@tom_mcghee)

I fucking hate Chelsea.

Doctor Strange (2017)

Haven’t seen it. Fucking hippy.

Prediction: Probably a draw. Fucking hate those as well.

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(@bifurcated_utd)

So much negativity this week from my co-clownshoes. And who can blame them. We’ve got as much chance of winning this game as Easter eggs have of surviving breakfast at the Rooney’s.

And I said “What about Breakfast at Rooney’s?”
She said “I think I remember the film. And as I recall, I think, we both kinda liked it”
And I said “No. It was just a football a joke, and you’re just a pawn in my game of lols.”
She said “Pathetic cunt. Go watch Rocky V. And cry. Again.”

Prediction: Me to watch Rocky V. And cry. Again. 0-0 United.

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