(@Benglorious)

Can’t believe Stoke got a new manager today. Really can’t believe Stoke got a new manager at all. All I know about Paul Lambert is that he defeated the Kurgan and tasted that sweet, sweet Quickening.

Prediction: It’s a kind of magic. 0-0 United.

m

 (@tom_mcghee)

I am not writing another preview until we sign Alexis Sanchez. If we never sign him, so be it. I am a man of principle.

I might write something later if I get time the above is just bullshit to satisfy the reader.

Downsizing (2018)

Matt Damon and a Nazi get really small. Like, really small. That aside, pretty good.

Prediction: Goals for Sanchez. Tears for Arsenal. Work for Tom. 0-0 United.

m

(@bifurcated_utd)

Can’t believe the good people of that place famous cos of being where Robbie Williams is from sacked my 64th, sorry, sixty-fourth works better for my word count, favourite Welshman Mike Hughes?! At least he has the old electrical business to fall back on.

Imagine being famous for that. And pots. FTL.

Prediction: Hell is gone and heaven’s here there’s nothin’ left for you to fear. Shake your ass, come over here, now scream. Come on let me enter etc… 0-0 United.