Predictions

  (@Benglorious) Are we words today? M  (@tom_mcghee) You first M (@bifurcated_utd) An essay on the subject. Prediction: big editor man job at The New Statesman. Seems a bit too easy to just write that tbh. Ngl, feels like I’m missing something. 

  (@Benglorious) It’s telling how bad we are because I suggested we go clothes shopping instead of watching the match. Prediction: Misogyny to finally catch up with my weary bones. My weary bones not caring. 0-0 United, not us United, them United.  M  (@tom_mcghee) Remember back in days of yore when Kev went batshit with […]

  (@Benglorious) Are they playing M  (@tom_mcghee) Beginning to question youse guys commitment this season what are we Manchester United lol oh right M (@bifurcated_utd) Geno baso didn’t remember/care

  (@Benglorious) Prediction: Change of Luck? M  (@tom_mcghee) Prediction: Forgot to reply to this. That’s not a good sign re: words imho M (@bifurcated_utd) Luke Shaw returns to the side after his final treatment in the long since documented series of minor cosmetic adjustments in his bid to become Gary Barlow in 1995, so, expect everything […]

  (@Benglorious) Are we actually playing Prediction: Probably are actually playing M  (@tom_mcghee) We’re not doing words tonight are we I think I speak fro everyone when I say nobody gives a fuck Prediction: Rochdale innit? Caravan Cup (@bifurcated_utd) Fuck the children. Prediction: No-on cares, unless we win, and, or lose.

  (@Benglorious) Spam. Prediction: Brett will post this above Tom’s, so, the a joke won’t work. M  (@tom_mcghee) I would really like to but also I really can’t be bothered feels like we’re always playing West Ham and I’ve run out of pork based puns. Prediction: Brett will predict that Benno will predict etc (@bifurcated_utd) Embarrassed for […]

  (@Benglorious) I’d already given up by the time I got home from work last Friday, and this was only the third match. Saturday came, but I was not invested. At about 5 o’clock, habit, that relentless masochist, had me checking the score. Interesting enough to raise an eyebrow, but not interesting enough to chip […]

  (@Benglorious) We’re back, baby, like shit trainers and herpes. This time things will be different, though. Taking a leaf from the Athletic’s journalistic model means we now have writers at the top of their game, articles with fancy words (like herpes) that will be professionally researched, and also the most cutting-edge, up-to-date news anywhere. […]

  (@Benglorious)   Prediction: Not gonna do one. Look at the other two’s… M  (@tom_mcghee) Prediction: Not gonna do one. Look at the other two’s…   (@bifurcated_utd) Prediction: Not gonna do one. Look at the other twos…