Postgame

  We all saw the match, we all saw Hodgson throw himself off a pre-arranged cliff and we all saw Alan Shearer versus Danny Baker in the I’m The Most Disappointed England Fan-off, but have you seen what some of the brightest football minds of our generation thought about plucky England’s capitulation? Please let us […]

BifEUROcated WEEK DOS REVIEW   Tom (@tom_mcghee)       What the fuck Brett? I come into Bifurcated Towers, on the weekend, dodging mad nationalist pensioners, only to find youse pair have done less than me. I’ll be honest, I’ve mainly been playing GTA, watching Sopranos (It’s about the mafia) and watching the football so […]

BifEUROcated Week Uno Review!!!* *That’s funny cos the middle bit where it says ‘Week Uno’ is in white, so you can’t see what it says. What it says, I guess we’ll never know. This isn’t just a lazy/crass cut and paste of our “best” Twitter bits… It is. Bite us. “I despaired when Brett, who […]

Winning cups >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Not winning cups. Here’s the final final five things us learned this season: 1. Hearing rumours Mourinho might be new Manager. 2. Pardew has stolen Ross and Monica’s Dad’s moves. 3. I liked it when Jesse scored the goal that won us the cup. It was like the opposite thing that happened […]

Now we’re Twitterfamousers you’d think we’d be too Johnny Big Boots to learn. And you’d be right tbf. Who needs to learn anything when you’re hobnobbing with the Twitterati; drinking pre-mixed Bucks Fizz from posh glasses?! Tell your 3 RT and 5 Like faces to suck on your disappointment. Bite us. But we’re legally obligated […]

What a dramatic Sky Sports send off for Boleyn Park, as both teams played their part in a momentous Sky Sports game brought to you in association with Sky Sports, that should have been fondly remembered by generations of Sky Sports viewers for generations of Sky Sports. Sadly, the game will be remembered for the […]

By the time you read this Manchester City and Arsenal will have drawn 2-2, handing us an opportunity to – despite our best efforts – qualify for next season’s Champion’s League. Imagine that. Jose Mourinho has already said that if this happens he will manage every game, in the 2016/17 Premier League season, in just […]

If Leicester go on to win the league they’ll remember this day for the hell of a Vangleing they suffered at the hands of Louis Vangle’s Self-Harmy. Guess we’ll never know if they will. Not sure why anyone needs the excuse of arousing Vangle to elbow Robert Huth in the face. Especially anyone who has […]

That was fun. That game had everything. Apart from everything that it didn’t. Give Dave and Tony M everyone elses’ wages. Apart from all the people who have nothing to do with this professional football club. Lol @ professional.       Five things we learned: 1. I liked it when Rooney ran into the […]

Roondog is well and truly back. Run tell your Mamma. Scream it from the rooftops. Throw a party for some friends you haven’t seen since like forever. Live today like it’s your last. Tell that man or woman in the office that you flirt with occasionally, that you would leave your husband or wife and […]

Brett’s still crying into his magnificent chest hair, so the onus is yet again on yours truly to bring the mad review skills. Two wins in the space of four days equals the Premiership League record for most wins in four days over two completely different competitions. Vangle clearly is a manager who knows his […]