Bifurcated Manchester United ~ United vs City

Tom (@tom_mcghee)

Something about football, lazy joke, Optimus Prime reference, obscure Mos Eisley reference, peas and carrots peas and carrots

My preview (if poss, no computer here innit)

Lemon Cristal *****

Moonshine *****

Tangerine Dream ***

Super Polm ****

Lemon Haze Iso *****

Weed reviews go first, stupid data package f*cking it up in the running order don’t add this bit you chinless goon

Today is the biggest game in the Premiership League involving two teams that both have ‘Manchester’ as part of their name. United are the ones who play in the bright brown shirts and there is also the other team. Both of them have lots of money but one team has more of a certain type of money but they can’t spend that certain type of money because there’s rules about spending too much of that certain type of money because other teams don’t have as much of that certain type of money to spend as much of. It’s all very clear-cut.

Prediction: Vangle must be quietly confident going into today’s derby, especially coming off the back of so many wins that I’ve lost count. Three, I think. City have lost something like fourteen games in a row so Pellegrini must be feeling the opposite – loudly fearful. His players will pick up on these concerns as they are shouted to them on the pitch amidst racking sobs. Whilst they’re distracted by this, United will take advantage and strike. A goal for Roondog after the first mistake from Hart in his entire career will be swiftly followed by yet another Herrera goal. City try and rally for the second half, but the referee has no choice but to book the entire squad for illegal use of cars. In the ensuing chaos, Di Maria will knock in the third goal after a mesmerising dribble/dummy/feint/shimmy/lollipop/castanet/blancmange combo. 1-0 Manchester City.