EFLC: City (3) 0 – 1 (2) United
They say that sometimes when you win you actually lose, and that when you lose you sometimes actually win, and that when you win, you actually win, and the same goes for losing. I wish they’d make up their minds. I need a bag of aspirin. Here’s 5 things we learned on the night we […]
EFLC: City (3) vs. (1) United
(@tom_mcghee) Can’t do words tonight pals I am too tired from all the masturbating Prediction: Dutch rudder the fuck outta me bro (@Benglorious) I’m with Tom. Like, we’re in the same place. Wanking too much Prediction: Pass the butter (@bifurcated_utd) I’ve got a feeling (Woohoo!) that tonight’s gonna be a good night, that […]
(FAC): Tranmere 0 – 6 United
Serious question: do Harry Maguire goals even count if they are not thumping headers? i.e. is the score really 0 – 5? Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. We seem a lot better when our opponents are a league or 4 below us – maybe something to look at in the future? 2. 6 goals, […]
(FAC): Tranmere vs. United
(@Benglorious) There’s part of me that knows we will win comfortably like the champions of old unfortunately I left that part in an airport Wetherspoons three years ago Prediction: we’re not doing the 5 preview thing cos I fucked up M (@tom_mcghee) I knew the magic of the cup would re-unite the three amigos (friends). Sadly, […]
United 0 – 2 Burnley
2-2 aggregate, so, technically not a net loss, and worth every penny of the licence fee to watch the highlights on Match of the Day of that Jay Rodriguez worldy tbh Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. We should skip to the part where Gollum falls into Mount Doom 2. We should then point and […]
United vs. Burnley
With Marcus Rashford attending manual handling training for company compliance the goals scoring duties will have to be shared between the ghost of Ruud, Andreas from 59 yards, and O.G Here’s 5 things that, like our midfield, aren’t really things at all: 1. Someone pressed delete instead of copy on the WhatsApp group pre-match thoughts, […]
Liverpool 2 – 0 United
The great thing about being shit is that results like this barely register, let alone hurt Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. On the intro to he-man and masters of the universe Prince Adam says ‘fabulous powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said “by the powers of […]
United vs. Liverpool
As the mighty reds go marching on to glory in all the cups, only Jurgen Klopp and his other reds are standing in our way: Here’s 5 things to look out for: 1. I believe we will learn to love again 2. A drunk will lose a bet (the bet will be ‘I bet we […]
