Chelsea 0 - 2 United

Chelsea 0 – 2 United

Bahahahahahahahaha let’s see how long we can keep this up clue: not very long. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Having a midfielder who can pass accurately and quickly is handy. Also a guy who can take corners. Seems so obvious with hindsight. 2. Fred is a delight 3. Luke Shaw is quite clearly 90% […]

Chelsea vs. United

Chelsea vs. United

(@Benglorious) I must say I did enjoy the footage of our brave boys playing ping pong with a football in the sun. Really going to help them claw their way back into the champions league spots. Prediction: Martial with a brace using the penhold grip and a ton of topspin. 0-0 United M  (@tom_mcghee) During […]

ELC: Chelsea 1 - 2 United

ELC: Chelsea 1 – 2 United

3 games into our 18 month unbeaten run that gets us all the trophies and everything is going to Ole’s plan. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. I just watched Mad Max. Not one single person read a book in the whole film. 2. Well he is mad !! 3. Never heard of it tbh […]

ELC: Chelsea vs. United

ELC: Chelsea vs. United

    (@Benglorious) More dog gifs. Prediction: as above M  (@tom_mcghee) Have we discussed how much fred reminds me of Jar Jar Binks and how racist is that on a scale of Paul to Donald Trump Prediction: Also autocorrect made jar jar banks into jar jar bunks on my phone and that is his name now M (@bifurcated_utd) […]

United vs. Crystal Palace

United vs. Crystal Palace

  (@Benglorious) We’re back, baby, like shit trainers and herpes. This time things will be different, though. Taking a leaf from the Athletic’s journalistic model means we now have writers at the top of their game, articles with fancy words (like herpes) that will be professionally researched, and also the most cutting-edge, up-to-date news anywhere. […]

United 4 - 0 Chelsea

United 4 – 0 Chelsea

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNDDDDDDDD NOW YOU’RE GONNA etc Look, it’s the first 5 things learned of the season: 1. I liked how that kid scored a massive deflection and now he’s the new Ryan Giggs 2. How come Gary Neville doesn’t know how to use punctuation? 3. I watched it when I got home and it was not […]

United vs. Chelsea

United vs. Chelsea

United 1 - 1 Chelsea

United 1 – 1 Chelsea

1. Fuck it, stick the McTominator in nets.

United vs. Chelsea

United vs. Chelsea

  T. Won’t be doing words today pals i legit would rather stick forks in my eyes than write about those cunts. B. Bit harsh on Chelsea. B. Seconded.

FAC: Chelsea 0 - 2 United

FAC: Chelsea 0 – 2 United

The only real downside to last night’s result is the footage emerging of Alexis Sanchez looking very small. Apparently, he is just very small and not just very far away. Wait, two downsides: the MBM Krang/turtles tweet was wasted on all you scum.   Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. People sure don’t like Sanchez […]

FAC: Chelsea vs. United

FAC: Chelsea vs. United

(@Benglorious) Here’s yer boy with some more faultless logic – City thrashed Chelsea. Both City and United didn’t win in the Champions League last week. Ergo: United are as good as City. Double ergo: United will thrash Chelsea. Prediction: Did you not read that flawless argument? ’nuff said. 0-0 United. M  (@tom_mcghee) I will not […]

Chelsea 2 - 2 United

Chelsea 2 – 2 United

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