United vs Norwich

Ben (Benglorious):

The season was over for us long ago, so I still have no idea why I have to write these things.  It’s not like anything momentous has happened at Old Trafford this week……………………………………………………………..

HA!  You were expecting my phone to ring there, but the joke’s on you:  I’ve actually been keeping abreast of the football news this week.  For example: Alison Moyet got sacked as Everton manager on Tuesday and Diana Rigg is in the ring manager for the last four games, until they hire Jean-Claude van Damme as a permanent replacement.  It actually feels good to be so ITK for once.

Today, the Mustard Lickers are today’s visitors to our stadium building today for yet another of those game things they so love to play every week.  How many of these actual games there are in a season we’ll never know, but the vibe out there is that Delia Oliver’s boys are going to get a figurative spanking.  Where “there” is and what exactly a “vibe” is are two more things that sciencers have yet to discover, and I have no idea what a “spanking” is although just saying the word out loud has brought on a feeling of creepy dread that I just can’t shake off.

In lieu of my regular “players to watch out for” segment, I’ve included this infographical pictorial representation of Norwich’s “Greatest Ever Ex Eye” as voted for by their fans.  I came across this because I couldn’t think of any Norwich players to put in the aforementioned segment, and thought it was too funny to not share.  OOH!  Ruel Fox.  Watch out for him.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Prediction: New manager, new style.  Or back to the old style when we used to win things and stuff.  Giggsy has raised the expectations today and his team will not disappoint.  Expect fluidity, dynamism, pace, power, skill and a camaraderie amongst the players such as we’ve not seen since the heady days of the Fergie Dynasty all those eons ago.  Welbeck will zup zup his way through the wall of canaries to get us started; Rooney will bag the second by coolly slotting home from 127 yards; Mata will be the Spanish architect of our third and fourth goals, both scored by Janizzi, before scoring a goal of the season contender himself for our fifth goal.  With the game secure, Giggsy will then bring himself on to the most standingy ovation the world has ever seen, and a minute later he will weave and jink his way through all 24 of Norwich’s defenders to score a goal of such beauty and grace that the board will have no choice but to give him the manager’s job full time, or face the prospect of every team in England refusing to play until they do.  Yeah, the goal’s going to be THAT good.  1-0 Norwich.

 

No free stuff this week due to Mum being upset that nobody wants any of her junk.

 

About the author:  I love the Chosen One.  The newest chosen one, not that previous incumbent who was only chosen because his moving costs from Liverpool weren’t that expensive.

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Brett:

This is every blogger’s dream: one of your favourite players, who embodies the very spirit of your club, actually managing the thing! With so few blogs around, and so little opinion anywhere on the internet, everyone wants to know exactly what you think about it, and you have a duty as a blogger to satiate that want. It could almost be intimidating: thousands upon thousands of people hanging on your every word. Luckily, I have pre-prepared some words for such an occasion … they’re just here … wait a minute, juuuuust … no, not there. Not there either. Aaaah, I remember now, I was wearing my best jeans when I wrote it … no, not there. Aaaah course! Back pocket … no, not there. Oh! Of course! Duh! Silly me… the other back p… no, not there either. Oh yeah, I know where it is! Hold on…

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No, not there either. Could it beeeeee … no. How abooooou … no. Aaaahh! must beeeeeee … no. Bear with me a second…

 

 

 

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No, not there. Hahaha! What am I like?! Let’s try… no, not there. Could be… no, not there either. Wait! Got It! Back in a tick…

 

 

 

 

 

 

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No, no there either. Unleeeessssss…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Forgeddit.

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