United 0 – 0 Southampton

As we consolidated our position at the top of the any normal English Premier League season table, with another outstanding top of the any normal English Premier League season table performance, we learned 5 things…

1. Explosive diarrhoea is preferable to what we just watched.

2. As is vomiting at the same time.

3. I liked your coffee maker reference in the preview.

4. As a fellow sufferer of said virus, I must say mine is more akin to a regurgitated 3-week aged banana through a kaleidoscope. But still preferable.

5. There are now no jokes that make this funny, we are bad.

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