United 0 – 0 Southampton

As we consolidated our position at the top of the any normal English Premier League season table, with another outstanding top of the any normal English Premier League season table performance, we learned 5 things…

1. Explosive diarrhoea is preferable to what we just watched.

2. As is vomiting at the same time.

3. I liked your coffee maker reference in the preview.

4. As a fellow sufferer of said virus, I must say mine is more akin to a regurgitated 3-week aged banana through a kaleidoscope. But still preferable.

5. There are now no jokes that make this funny, we are bad.

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More 'Postgame'

United 3 - 2 Newcastle

United 3 – 2 Newcastle

UCL: United 0 - 0 Valencia

UCL: United 0 – 0 Valencia

West Ham 3 - 1 United

West Ham 3 – 1 United

CC: United 2 - 2 Derby

CC: United 2 – 2 Derby

United 1 - 1 Wolves

United 1 – 1 Wolves

CL: Young Boys 0 - 3 United

CL: Young Boys 0 – 3 United

Watford 1 - 2 United

Watford 1 – 2 United

Burnley 0 - 2 United

Burnley 0 – 2 United

United 0 - 3 Spurs

United 0 – 3 Spurs

More 'Reaction'

United 3 - 2 Newcastle

United 3 – 2 Newcastle

UCL: United 0 - 0 Valencia

UCL: United 0 – 0 Valencia

West Ham 3 - 1 United

West Ham 3 – 1 United

CC: United 2 - 2 Derby

CC: United 2 – 2 Derby

United 1 - 1 Wolves

United 1 – 1 Wolves

CL: Young Boys 0 - 3 United

CL: Young Boys 0 – 3 United

Watford 1 - 2 United

Watford 1 – 2 United

Burnley 0 - 2 United

Burnley 0 – 2 United

United 0 - 3 Spurs

United 0 – 3 Spurs

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