Mourinho

United 4 - 1 Bournemouth

United 4 – 1 Bournemouth

Starting to think sacking Mourinho was a good idea after all. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Pretty sure Rashford’s mum and dad are Maradona and Pele 2. Pele definitely not the dad 3. lol because of his limp member 4. lol

Liverpool 3 - 1 United

Liverpool 3 – 1 United

He never learned from our learns. Here’s 5 things we learned – dedicated to the memory of Jose Borinho, cos borinBAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA how have we not used that befoBAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA!!   1. Conceding two goals to that weird troll man is a damning indictment (his legs are far to short for his weird […]

Liverpool vs. United

Liverpool vs. United

  (@Benglorious) Prediction: See below. Also cba. M  (@tom_mcghee) Haven’t done words today as I believe my silence will inspire the team. Also why not wait until after the game and then base our preview on the result? We’ll look like Nostradamus. Prediction: Waiting until after the game to base our preview on the result to look like […]

UCL: Valencia vs. United

UCL: Valencia vs. United

(@Benglorious) YEE-HAW HEAD ‘EM UP RIDE ‘EM OUT etc Prediction: Rubber to not have been invented yet. Hat-trick for Pogba plus a brace for Lukaku. 0-0 Valencia M  (@tom_mcghee) Why is it a dead rubber?* We don’t call a game that counts a live rubber. Rubber discrimination? Not for me to say but obviously yes. […]

United 2 - 2 Arsenal

United 2 – 2 Arsenal

Mourinho avoided handing Arsenal the Premier League Title at Old Trafford and didn’t kick a boot into David Beckham’s face after the match, so, should be seen as a vast improvement on the Fergie Era imho.   Here is another 5 things we learned, taking our total tally of learns over the last 4 years […]

Southampton vs. United

Southampton vs. United

(@Benglorious) Howdy, pardner. It’s time to dust off yer six-shooter and mount up. Tonight, we ride. By tonight I mean late afternoon, and by ride I mean scrape another goalless draw. The Pools panel (ask yer da) must hate us. Prediction: All posses joined immediately and all missions completed with no software crashes. Lol more […]

UCL: United 1 - 0 Young Boys

UCL: United 1 – 0 Young Boys

The warm up act to Mourinho’s performance art piece was every bit as exciting as Mourinho’s performance art piece. Here’s 5 things we learnzied: 1. Jose knows and can anticipate when a camera will be turned on him; each action is premeditated and deliberate, he is the living embodiment of the showman. Or he was […]

UCL United vs. Young Boys

UCL United vs. Young Boys

(@Benglorious) Long days and pleasant nights, pardner. Mosey on over here, take a load off and wash some of the trail out ya throat. No need to be afeared, buddy, I won’t bite ya. You like stories? An old timer like me, I got lots o’stories. Lemme tell you about this gang I knew back […]

United 3 - 2 Newcastle

United 3 – 2 Newcastle

  Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. I learnt nothing. I actually unlearnt stuff I thought I knew ie what the fuck was that game? 2. Pogba was great second half. I feel like I should say this because I moan about him so much. 3. Making Lukaku a CB will be Jose’s last great […]

United vs. Newcastle

United vs. Newcastle

(@Benglorious) Couldn’t.  (@tom_mcghee) Care. (@bifurcated_utd) Less.

UCL: United vs. Valencia

UCL: United vs. Valencia

(@Benglorious) Couldn’t.    (@tom_mcghee) Care. (@bifurcated_utd) Less.

West Ham 3 - 1 United

West Ham 3 – 1 United

So proud. Another none-loss at OT. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. You can make Febreze with fabric softener and water mixed in a spray bottle. 2. Beginning to think Jose Mourinho isn’t the brilliant tactician I thought he was [insert homer running in circles on the ground gif or don’t who fucking cares] 3. […]

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