West Ham were the opponents for this cup game and I bet they wished they’d spent more money on players rather than wasting it on expensive bubbles. Rashford was the key, for the nine hundredth time this season, with a goal so good that he’s surpassed the need to have a stand at Old Trafford named after him – Manchester is annexing Oldham and naming it after our newest hero. Infrastructure improvements will come based on appearances and trophies.
Here’s the five things the three of us learned from the match even though it was really only two of us and it’s probably more or less than five things anyway:
Emoji that looks like a football) Rashdawg is the new Roondog but better because he can actually do those goal things.
Emoji that looks like a trophy) David de Savid is the new Petid de Schmeichid but better because of his hair and stuff.
Emoji that looks like dollar dollar bills yo) Herrera weighs the same as a small bag of sugar.
Emoji that looks like that piece of fire thing that the kids love so much) Fellaini is exactly like Groot except that he doesn’t give his life for his teammates, which is a shame. His vocabulary is also less-advanced.
Emoji that looks like a weird trumpet oh it’s a tannoy speaker thing) I concur.