Liverpool 2 - 0 United

Liverpool 2 – 0 United

The great thing about being shit is that results like this barely register, let alone hurt Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. On the intro to he-man and masters of the universe Prince Adam says ‘fabulous powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said “by the powers of […]

United vs. Liverpool

United vs. Liverpool

As the mighty reds go marching on to glory in all the cups, only Jurgen Klopp and his other reds are standing in our way: Here’s 5 things to look out for: 1. I believe we will learn to love again 2. A drunk will lose a bet (the bet will be ‘I bet we […]

United 0 - 2 Cardiff

United 0 – 2 Cardiff

Thank. Fuck. Here’s the final 5 things we learned from the season that taught us so much without teaching us anything we didn’t already know, or want to know or want to learn about knowing about: 1. Bad luck, Liverpool. 2. I’d rather have no chance of winning the league from the start than have […]

United 0 - 0 Liverpool

United 0 – 0 Liverpool

We didn’t watch it.

United vs. Liverpool

United vs. Liverpool

  (@Benglorious) Can’t wait for the Henderson/Pogba battle today, where one will finally be crowned the greatest midfielder in the Premier League and the other will still be called Jordan. Prediction: Ole to be at the wheel, but he makes sure everybody’s got their seatbelts on and all the fluids are topped up. Especially the […]

Fulham 0 - 3 United

Fulham 0 – 3 United

“We’ve finally got our United back!” Plastics. We remained Top Reds throughout. No need to look back through our previews and reviews over the last 3 years.  The science checks out.   Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Glad I’m not a Chelsea fan 2. Which team do you support, again? 3. The best one […]

United 3 - 1 Huddersfield

United 3 – 1 Huddersfield

We’ve written “a lot”, so, no need to fill with this introduction this week.       Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Now we definitely know. 2. Stream was so bad I couldn’t really watch it. First half was ok but then it kept freezing loads then it went back in time, then it […]

Liverpool 3 - 1 United

Liverpool 3 – 1 United

He never learned from our learns. Here’s 5 things we learned – dedicated to the memory of Jose Borinho, cos borinBAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA how have we not used that befoBAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA!!   1. Conceding two goals to that weird troll man is a damning indictment (his legs are far to short for his weird […]

Liverpool vs. United

Liverpool vs. United

  (@Benglorious) Prediction: See below. Also cba. M  (@tom_mcghee) Haven’t done words today as I believe my silence will inspire the team. Also why not wait until after the game and then base our preview on the result? We’ll look like Nostradamus. Prediction: Waiting until after the game to base our preview on the result to look like […]

West Ham vs. United

West Ham vs. United

  (@Benglorious) I ain’t. Prediction: I ain’t. m  (@tom_mcghee) You should see my fucking Instagram. Also i just saw an interview where Liverpool keeper Alison is described as ‘Liverpool’s lean, erect, handsome finger man’ and I want to know who stole my book of homoerotic poems to Benno. Prediction: Phil Jones. 3-2 West Ham, Barrels rolled out […]

CL: Young Boys vs. Manchester United

CL: Young Boys vs. Manchester United

  (@Benglorious) Young girl, get out of my mind My love for you is way out of line Better run girl You’re much too young girl m Fuck. That ain’t right. m Prediction: United to get one over on Liverpool by having a player with no working eyes. His name is Jones. Phil Jones. 0-0 […]

FAC Final: United 0 - 1 Chelsea

FAC Final: United 0 – 1 Chelsea

Can’t wait to watch Liverpool collect the Champions League title, to cap another wonderful week in the club’s recent history. Here’s 5 things we learned, apart from that Phil Jones is a legend: 1. I think I preferred it when ferguson was in charge. 2. I actually enjoyed the Royal Wedding more and I didn’t […]

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