Liverpool 2 – 0 United
The great thing about being shit is that results like this barely register, let alone hurt Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. On the intro to he-man and masters of the universe Prince Adam says ‘fabulous powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic sword and said “by the powers of […]
United vs. Liverpool
As the mighty reds go marching on to glory in all the cups, only Jurgen Klopp and his other reds are standing in our way: Here’s 5 things to look out for: 1. I believe we will learn to love again 2. A drunk will lose a bet (the bet will be ‘I bet we […]
United 0 – 2 Cardiff
Thank. Fuck. Here’s the final 5 things we learned from the season that taught us so much without teaching us anything we didn’t already know, or want to know or want to learn about knowing about: 1. Bad luck, Liverpool. 2. I’d rather have no chance of winning the league from the start than have […]
United vs. Liverpool
(@Benglorious) Can’t wait for the Henderson/Pogba battle today, where one will finally be crowned the greatest midfielder in the Premier League and the other will still be called Jordan. Prediction: Ole to be at the wheel, but he makes sure everybody’s got their seatbelts on and all the fluids are topped up. Especially the […]
Fulham 0 – 3 United
“We’ve finally got our United back!” Plastics. We remained Top Reds throughout. No need to look back through our previews and reviews over the last 3 years. The science checks out. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Glad I’m not a Chelsea fan 2. Which team do you support, again? 3. The best one […]
United 3 – 1 Huddersfield
We’ve written “a lot”, so, no need to fill with this introduction this week. Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Now we definitely know. 2. Stream was so bad I couldn’t really watch it. First half was ok but then it kept freezing loads then it went back in time, then it […]
Liverpool 3 – 1 United
He never learned from our learns. Here’s 5 things we learned – dedicated to the memory of Jose Borinho, cos borinBAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA how have we not used that befoBAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHA!! 1. Conceding two goals to that weird troll man is a damning indictment (his legs are far to short for his weird […]
Liverpool vs. United
(@Benglorious) Prediction: See below. Also cba. M (@tom_mcghee) Haven’t done words today as I believe my silence will inspire the team. Also why not wait until after the game and then base our preview on the result? We’ll look like Nostradamus. Prediction: Waiting until after the game to base our preview on the result to look like […]
West Ham vs. United
(@Benglorious) I ain’t. Prediction: I ain’t. m (@tom_mcghee) You should see my fucking Instagram. Also i just saw an interview where Liverpool keeper Alison is described as ‘Liverpool’s lean, erect, handsome finger man’ and I want to know who stole my book of homoerotic poems to Benno. Prediction: Phil Jones. 3-2 West Ham, Barrels rolled out […]
CL: Young Boys vs. Manchester United
(@Benglorious) Young girl, get out of my mind My love for you is way out of line Better run girl You’re much too young girl m Fuck. That ain’t right. m Prediction: United to get one over on Liverpool by having a player with no working eyes. His name is Jones. Phil Jones. 0-0 […]
FAC Final: United 0 – 1 Chelsea
Can’t wait to watch Liverpool collect the Champions League title, to cap another wonderful week in the club’s recent history. Here’s 5 things we learned, apart from that Phil Jones is a legend: 1. I think I preferred it when ferguson was in charge. 2. I actually enjoyed the Royal Wedding more and I didn’t […]