United 1 – 2 City

Now we’re world famous across all 3 continents, after being nominated for the FBAs, we have no time to watch this shit – what with all the after-dinner mints, meating and grating, and opining of Supermarkets. Oooh, ruddy Tescos. Tesno more like.

Our PA told us to say lol @ Bravo’s footwork and his ability to trap an ankle dead from 5 yards. And to mention in passing that Kevin de Bruyne is actually Kev Brown, who keeps pigeons with his dad, down the ginnel, and so a huge naughty fraud and so his goals and assists shouldn’t count, or we’re gonna tell Mrs Brown what her son’s been up to when he tells her he’s just popping down the corner shop for a can of dandelion and burdock and a sherbet dib dab.

Here’s 5 things us learneded from the moral victory against Kev and his so called mates:

1. It is bad when you lose but it gives you perspective when you realise there’s worse things in the world.

2. Like losing to City.

3. Pep and Jose used to be pals at Barcelona.

4. They are not pals anymore.

5. Ghost in the machine. Maybe a metaphor? (I did’t watch it)

6. G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-g-GHOST??!! SCOOBY!!!!!!