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EFL CUP QF: Bristol City 2 - 1 United

EFL CUP QF: Bristol City 2 – 1 United

Told you last minute goals were for tools. Here’s another 5 things we learned: 1. Wasn’t there a big row about not being on telly? It is on telly. Lol. What a day. 2. That was the fa cup. Read a fucking book sometime. 3. Not sure you can fit both teams on a telly […]

EFL Cup QF: Bristol City vs. United

EFL Cup QF: Bristol City vs. United

  (@Benglorious) YOU SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL TEAM Prediction:  0-0 United. m  (@tom_mcghee) Who the fuck are we playing now? Oh wait is it Brighton? Everyone is moaning about a bottle of wine. Prediction: Why don’t you just bum Julia Caesar? 0-0 United   m (@bifurcated_utd) Hey lads! Think you mean WINEing! Prediction: Might do. The […]

Sunderland 0 - 3 United

Sunderland 0 – 3 United

Captain. Leader. Legend. Haterz gonna hate, but Fella’s gonna regulate! Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Goals are good.  

G.Garvey: Zlatan

G.Garvey: Zlatan

EFL Cup Final: United 3 - 2 Southampton

EFL Cup Final: United 3 – 2 Southampton

AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US! WE’RE GONNA WIN THE LEAGUE cup! Here’s 5 things we learned after our momentous day out at Wemberley: 1. Winning is good when you’re hungover. 2. It’s also good at other times. 3. Can’t decide if Lingard […]

English Champions League World Cup Final

English Champions League World Cup Final

(@Benglorious) If I get time, I’ll do the best Southampton joke there’s ever been. If I don’t get time, I’ll just mention Craig David. Prediction: I may miss the start of the match so someone will have to fill me in. This is our most important match of the last seven days. Pogba was born […]

United vs Hull

United vs Hull

 (@Benglorious) Hull is a 1983 British-American science fantasy film directed by Peter Yates and starring Ken Marshall, Lysette Anthony, David Battley and Freddie Jones. It was produced by Ron Silverman and released by Columbia Pictures.Hull’s distinctive features include an unlikely union between the science fiction and fantasy genres, a robust score by James Horner, early […]

FA Cup 4th Round: United vs. Wigan

FA Cup 4th Round: United vs. Wigan

   (@Benglorious) Hopefully we can shake off the last two cup defeats suffered by Liverpool, which ended all their hopes of silverware this season, and stick it right up Wigan. I just get the strange feeling that Liverpool’s current plight may raise the spirits at Old Trafford, even amongst the fans. m Prediction: Martial to […]

United 1 - 1 Scum

United 1 – 1 Scum

  CAPS LOCK AND VARIOUS BUTTONS ON MY COMPUTER HAVE LEGIT GONE TO SHIT> SEND HELP> CAN”T EVEN DO PUNCTUATION> FUCK MY LIFE> Here’s 5 things we learned, which were written before the buttons issue above: 1. Pogba is bad. 2. #Pogba is worse. 3. Hope we long ball our way to next season’s Champions League Final. […]

United vs. Scum

United vs. Scum

   (@Benglorious) Winning nine matches in a row is lovely and a real morale booster, but eight of those wins were against West Ham and the other one was just Spurs so let’s not kid ourselves. Today is the real test: Liverpool. Their league position suggests they are ahead of us and they possibly do […]

United 0 - 0 Burnley

United 0 – 0 Burnley

Another day, another 0-0 thrashing dealt out by the Mighty All Blanks! Looking forward to us introducing the Daba before matches, to psyche out opponents. Jose genuinely proved how much he genuinely cares about football by getting himself genuinely sent to the stands for being genuinely angry about the football he still genuinely cares so […]

EFLC: United 1 - 0 City

EFLC: United 1 – 0 City

If you want to learn that beating City is loads better than losing to City, and that Herrera is really spoiling us (lol, like the chocolate advert. You fuck off and get new jokes), and that well known raconteur and Royal correspondent Paul Gunning had this to say, “If ‘Antonio Valencia actually has a left […]

Bi-Mark: Footballiversity

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Bi-Konny: Michael Owen Reads Mean Tweets...

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