
Sunderland vs. United
Benno (@Benglorious) Sunderland has been in the news for all the wrong reasons this week, but there is definitely Stadium of Light at the end of the tunnel – the lane closures on the A1231 are necessary for the future construction of the New Wear Crossing bridge. Stay patient, Sunderlishmen and women. Opposition Summary: Sunderland AFC […]

Villa vs United
Tom (@Tom_McGhee): Aston Villa, if that’s their real name, ear necklaces, magic beans, and I wish Optimus Prime was real and other things what Tom would say irl. Prediction: idgi. Benno (@Benglorious): After a rather interesting chat with JUSTIN BIEBER our only reader the other night, I think I may have discovered NORTH KOREA […]

Fairytale of De Gea – A Song By Paul Off Of The Rant Cast
Here we are again … simply enjoying another wonderful Christmas song!

A Perennial Problem: Or When Is A Tree Actually A Tree?
Trees – the lungs of the planet: the perfect accompaniment to a park, a woodland walk, or an illustration of a grassy hillock. What’s not to like about trees? But, what happens when trees get ideas above their station? Humans have been passing themselves off as trees ever since the olden days, adopting tree-like characteristics […]

Thomas Cooked?
Tom Cleverley is fertile ground for cynics, and it would be reasonable to assert that he’s invited this upon himself in apparently choosing to embrace narcissism where authenticity would have served him better. Cynics are, after all, hopeless romantics with cripplingly high moral and ethical (and mostly hypocritical) standards, that the modern footballer couldn’t possibly […]

Present Absence
We sometimes find ourselves saying things like: ‘If only RVP had been available for the derby.’ Or, ‘if only Fellaini was any one of a whole rake of other players who you care to mention.’ Or, ‘if only Ashley Young had legs that fit right, and were on the right way round.’ Or, ‘if only […]

United’s Midfield: Needing Something Other
For the past one hundred summers (or thereabouts), the transfer window for United fans has played out like a clever analogy for unparalleled frustration; with nothing remotely central-midfieldy to celebrate. But for a club who supposedly don’t have, haven’t had, or even seemingly got all that close to buying, any one of the best central […]