Michael Carrick

S. Wolf: Michael Carrick

S. Wolf: Michael Carrick

Bifurcated’s Inside Scoopage

As promised, us the real heroes, have got the hot scoop (old newspaper term) on the most recent club leaks. Obviously as superfans we’ve long been privy to the club’s inner workings but think the time is right to tell you, the reader, what we’ve learnt. Learned? Learnt? (These are alternative forms of the past […]

CL: United vs CSKA Moscow

CL: United vs CSKA Moscow

 Benno (@Benglorious) Rather cleverly, Brett has put a video in his bit that won’t play on my computer so I can’t ruin/steal his joke. This makes me think he’s got an adult to help him which is clearly against the rules that I just thought of. I also can’t ruin/steal Tom’s jokes because I have […]

LC: United 0 – 0 Middlesborough (1-3 pens)

With Halloween just around the corner, we’re giving this analysis an egg theme… An egg each took the match into Added Egg Time and then eggsactly what happened next has been destroyed in the fire. No doubt, Capper Roo set the eggsample, and Michael ‘The Michael Carrick’ Carrick, and Ashley ‘The Elder’ Young did the […]

Sherwood Takes Charge

Tim Sherwood walked into the dressing room. Louis van Gaal’s reign had been a disaster, with United failing to make the Champions League, or even the Europa League. There had been an outcry among the papers, and, in their infinite wisdom, Ed Woodward and the Glazer family had decided a domestic manager was the best option. Sherwood’s run […]

FAC (Replay): United vs Cambridge

  Benno (@Benglorious) I don’t know much about replays (nobody does) but I really don’t want to sit through that drab 0-0 again (nobody does), so why BT Sport are showing the game again, nobody does.  It would make more sense (the cup’s format, not that previous sentence) for the two teams involved to play […]

Carrick

Carrick

United vs Leicester

United vs Leicester

Benno (@Benglorious) It’s all excitement and joy today in Bifurcated Towers as myself and Tom (the guy with the preview below mine that you always skip over to get to Brett’s little piece of insanity) are actually visiting the Theatre of Dreams in actual real life and stuff.  Apparently, the previews we write are for […]

United 2013/14 Season Review

United 2013/14 Season Review

Benno (@Benglorious):   The Bobbins:  A Tale of Trying King Alexander had ruled Traffordonia for nearly thirty years.  He was much respected by his enemies and beloved by his people because during his reign the kingdom had flourished, and was the envy of the whole world.  Alexander knew that his time as king was coming […]

CL: Bayern 3 (4) - (2) 1 United

CL: Bayern 3 (4) – (2) 1 United

Unlike Fergie, Moyes didn’t have the luxury of a Michael Owen on the bench in the big Champions’ League game, or even a Berba to leave out completely … and so the result in the end was inevitable. Rooney. Rooney. Rooney. Rooney. Rooney. Rooney. Hey?! Carrick. Carrick. Carrick. Carrick. Carrick. Carrick. Hey?! *note to self: try mixing […]

United 0 - 3 City

United 0 – 3 City

If Moyes was trying to upset me, then he was going about it in exactly the right way in attempting to replace Carrick with Tony in the opening ten minutes. Carrick was injured, so potentially needed replacing – I get that – but why not bring on Fletcher? In readying Tony, Moyes gave one of […]

United vs Newcastle

United vs Newcastle

Tom (@Tom_McGhee): Crisis averted, I’m back (it can’t have escaped anyone’s notice that our season has dipped dramatically since I went on sabbatical). I’ll be honest, I was hoping that my return would coincide with a decisive victory against Everton but since that’s clearly not going to happen, it might as well be now*. Anyways, […]

Bi-Mark: Footballiversity

Bi-Benno: Where Are They Right Now..?

Bi-Konny: Michael Owen Reads Mean Tweets...

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