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Brighton vs. United

Brighton vs. United

        (@Benglorious) Brighton will be out for revenge today after United beat them in the 1983 FA Cup final which also saw them relegated from the old First Division. The rules were different back then. Prediction: Pogba...

United 2 – 1 Leicester

United 2 - 1 Leicester

CHAMPIONEEEES!! CHAMPIONEEEES!!! OLAY!! OLAY!! OLAY!!   That’s right … Mushrooms and Skin Cream. Mushrooms and Skin Cream.   Here’s 5 things we learned (we actually learned 6 things but Brett’s 6th thing was diss on the NHS, so, he is...

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RT @UtdRantcast: Picasso had his blue period, Louis van Gaal had his Nick Powell period.
28 months ago from Twitter for Android

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West Ham 0 - 0 United

West Ham 0 – 0 United

JFC, STILL ONE MORE GAME TO GO! KILL ME! NOW! PLEASE! Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Football is a great game. I love it so much. 2. It is the greatest game and I love it. 3. More like Mark IG-Noble !! 4. More like IDGI-Noble !! 5. I love football more than all of us and me combined.

West Hammers vs. United

West Hammers vs. United

    (@Benglorious) It’s always great playing West Ham, especially fifteen times in three weeks. Sometimes we even beat them. Except when Blackburn won the league that one time. Ask your dad. Or Paul. Whichever one actually remembers. Paul. Prediction: Rooney to score from anywhere up to 70 yards away but only if he plays. Martial to do a madness and Zlatan to kick the ref’s face off. The goal stands. 0-0 United.    (@tom_mcghee)...

Brighton 1 - 0 United

Brighton 1 – 0 United

A If we can beat all the top teams, and yet get beaten by all the worst teams, and yet can win, lose, or draw against all the mid-table teams, and still finish se, no I’ve forgotten my etc.     Here’s another 5 things we learned, even if we haven’t learned what the league is called: 1. One of the worst games of the season and we’ve had a fair few to choose from...

Brighton vs. United

Brighton vs. United

(@Benglorious) I still can’t believe there’s games left in this shitpot season. At least we’ve got the whole summer to get a break from football. Prediction: Brighton to have an interesting concept, but make poor use of Will Smith, have a terrible plot and just not be a cohesive piece of filmmaking. How can you fuck up a film about orcs with machine guns?!? Goals for Lingard and Martial. 0-0 United. m  (@tom_mcghee) Legit had no...

United 2 - 1 Arsenal

United 2 – 1 Arsenal

a He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink. He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink. He sings the songs that remind him of the good times. He sings the songs that remind him of the best times… Who ‘He’ is … I guess we’ll never know.     Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. Give Fellaini Brett’s wages. 2. His pockets are not deep enough. 3. And besides are filled with hundreds...

United vs. Arsenal

United vs. Arsenal

  (@Benglorious) Can’t believe I’ve only just realised that his name is Arsene and he’s the owner of Arsenal. It’s like they’re twins with unimaginative parents who love butts. Prediction: Wenger to sign off in his last game against United à la Steven Gerrard; by being linked to the Rangers job. Goals for Shaw and Welbeck bookend a credible win for Watford. Wenger to get a standing ovation from the knowledgeable Old Trafford crowd until he...

FAC SF United 2 - 1 Tottenham Spurs

FAC SF United 2 – 1 Tottenham Spurs

AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US!!!! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE US!!!!! AND NOW YOU’RE GONNA BELIEVE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSS … !!!! Wait. What were we saying?! andnowyou’regonnabelieveus, andnowyou’regonnabelieveus, andnowyou’regonnabelieveus no, it’s gone.   Here’s 5 things we learned: 1. After a couple of minor upgrades Atreus becomes a decent ally to Kratos. 2. Herrera is the Lingard that Dele Alli thinks he is. 3. I like how every game lately has been like an A-Team episode...

FAC SF: United vs. The Ham Spurs

FAC SF: United vs. The Ham Spurs

(@Benglorious) The sun is shining, God of War is up and running, and it’s FA Cup semi-final day. I don’t want to seem like I’m exaggerating when I say this is the greatest day in the history of our species, but it truly is the greatest day ever. Prediction: Goals for Sanchez, Pogba and Smalling give United what looks like an easy trip back to Wembley for the final until the review board awards all three...

Bournemouth 0 - 2 United

Bournemouth 0 – 2 United

We learned nothing. That doesn’t count.

Bournemouth vs. United

Bournemouth vs. United

(@Benglorious) I am on holiday so suck your disappointment right on its dick. Prediction: Me to ruin my holiday for me (I’m obvs on holiday alone cos me) by constantly checking my phone to see what great a jokes Brett is tweeting tonight. 0-0 United. m  (@tom_mcghee) What words? Are we playing tonight? On a Wednesday?? Make me. Seriously. Prediction: I should be able to do some words when I get home but I maybe...

United 0 - 1 West Brom

United 0 – 1 West Brom

whnwkmkcsmklsnncjknsjdkcnjsnjkdnfjnsdcjnbkbkbkbfokbofbkofbkfbmkfmbmmfgdsajkhhwuoahvuinsadivninavnianvniavna xjkcsdcsdnsajvnsjvnsjdv;sdnvsdn;anvsdnavlsdlka;vnsalnvlsdnvlsd etc Here’s 5 things we sjdhfkjsdahvcjksdjkbvjkdsbauibfewbacinjknlakwecnwamc: 1. Well done, City. We’ll try harder next season maybe. 2. Fuck City suck it you blue fucks. 3. We are terrible at football.

United vs. West Brom

United vs. West Brom

(@Benglorious) Brett’s back from Poland so there’s no need to do any words or jokes, cos he’s the best and whatever I write will only embarrass me when compared to his words or jokes. Prediction: I write some words or jokes and am embarrassed. 0-0 United. m  (@tom_mcghee) I am out having birthday meals please put these words: fuck the haters, one love, peace. Or a good joke about Alan Pardew. Film Review: To be...

Bi-Mark: Footballiversity

Bi-Benno: Where Are They Right Now..?

Bi-Konny: Michael Owen Reads Mean Tweets...

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